Battleship Trailer Gives Us That Sinking Feeling

IGN has gotten their hands on the new poster and trailer for the upcoming film, "Battleship." In case you missed it, the film is supposedly based on the classic board game of the same name. Yes, you heard that right. Get back into your chair.

Ridiculous, you say? Ha! Perhaps! But what's more ridiculous than making a film based on a one-dimensional board game from 40 years ago? Making a film that seemingly only adapts said game in name only. But, to be fair--there's really not much source material to draw upon, which is what made the choice to make this film such a massive head-scratcher. It's not as if this is Halo or Dungeons and Dragons. Battleship has about as much depth as a game of Boggle... pun intended.

However, "no story" didn't stop Hollywood from making 3 more Pirates of the Caribbean movies, right? So why not a film about plastic boats with pegs in them? The result of such forward thinking is a story for the ages: A rather extensive Naval exercise is rudely interrupted by--wait for it--water-born alien ships which begin attacking our vessels for unknown reasons. Our apparent hero? A brash, young officer who must prove himself while dodging the scorn of his girlfriend's protective father--who just so happens to be his commander.

I don't know about you guys, but when I was playing Battleship as a kid, I know this is exactly what I was thinking. And if they'd been around at the time, I'm sure I would have envisioned Taylor Kitsch, Rihanna, Brooklyn Decker and an apparently desperate Liam Neeson manning the helm.

In all seriousness, I can't for the life of me understand why this film is even being called Battleship, since the reference to this vintage toy can't possibly increase public awareness, right? In fact, I'd go as far as to say if they had chosen to name the film something else, it might actually have more credibility. As it stands now, the only connection to the game is a rather heavy-handed shot of "pegs" being shot into a ship in the trailer (yes, it's in there).

Until the actual release, I'm going to keep telling myself this is some sort of April Fool's joke. If it's real, then I can only hope Hollywood green-lights that film adaptation of Gnip Gnop I've been clamoring for.

"In a world where the fate of mankind rests on three magic spheres..."

See the trailer here